So…I have not written on here in months and months. I am not
sure if I even still deserve this place! Is life any less brilliant since last
time I wrote? Absolutely not, there is more brilliance than ever.
I wanted to wait until this was final to announce it. Now it
is final. I divorced. Yes, I know again, another breakup, another upheaval,
another letting go of dreams and hopes and wishes about the future. This time…with
kids included. Wohoo, you know that is fun.
The truth is this: It hurt very badly. I still sit with the
pain, digest the scope of it all, cry at inopportune times.
The truth is also this: I am clearer, calmer, more sober and
peaceful than I have ever been in my life. I am so very grateful to my ex. for
giving me my children. These particular children could only have been born to
he and I and nothing will ever make me regret or want to change that. Ours is
still a grand love story, but now it has changed. As all things do, our story
has changed. My story has a twist ending. Someone told me during this whole
mess, “You will be ok, even if it the future doesn’t look how you imagined it”.
No truer words have ever been spoken.
I am so happy and so grateful for everything I have in my
life. I lost a marriage, but I have gained so very much. New people have come
into my life to help and nurture and hand hold me along on this incredibly
transformative process. I believe in love more than I ever have. I am convinced
that love is the most fundamental element of our existence.
So…I am still living in my beloved Morocco, not planning on
going anywhere as I quite love my life here and am very grateful for everything
and everyone in it.
The girls made it into a great school that will bring them a
4th language and I could not be more proud and more excited for
them. I have made major professional advancements and life is good at the moment.
Even if it’s not the way I expected it to look, the view is still very nice.
Now that I have gotten this announcement out of the way, I
can start my writing here again.
5 comments:
Thank you thank you. Looking forward to having you back so your talent extraordinair can remain public. I know that I am not alone in missing your writing !
Thanks for your honesty and am actually thinking of writing something too but more in the lines of songs etc....gonna crack on with them. I know its painful and believe me I think that we all have initial shaped holes on our hearts that only that person can fill...in that thy never really go away and even after 13 years I still feel it.
Beautiful and I have missed your writing too! Also, this new kind of family you have...pretty powerful. You are so graceful and I am so happy you are writing and have been so inspired ;)
A Changed, Grand Love Story
Indeed.
Your own words deliver truth undeniable.
YOU are AMAZING!!!! Miss you dearly! Looking forward to hearing more =)
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